"How do I let them be what they were without demanding they continue, sure to decay in my clenched fists?" - this sentence is so how I feel whenever I think of our loud, crazy household emptying out. That desire to HOLD onto the moments and the tiny humans my hubby and I raised...while knowing that love means letting these children go. Beautifully written, Jen. And I love your resolve: "I will write, listening to my life—and to God in my life—and remember that paying attention can be its own act of worship."
Aww, sending you hugs, Jen! I have completed 1 year of empty nesting and this week I take our second child back to her Sophomore year of college. Our oldest has moved to another state, and this season is so strange!! I feel like my blog has become quite depressing and dark this season as I navigate what life means after the kids have gone. I know they still need us, and young adult struggles hit harder than little babies for whom a Band-Aid or ice cream could cure all ills! Looking forward to seeing what this season lights in your soul as you write and share!
Somedays my hubby tells me to write something a tad more cheerful LOL but I think I am inherently a bit of a dark soul :) I just love tapping into the dark edges of my heart!
This touched my heart so! Every word and the meaning behind it. God is showing me more and more that there is season for everything, yet it is hard to let go. But like you, I will write! Bless you Jen!
Thanks for sharing this time of life transition so beautifully. I experienced many of the same feelings nine years ago when my youngest moved out. Let me tell you, there are many joys to come!
The sweeping of the kitchen floor caught me. Twenty-five years of motherhood held countless moments worth remembering, and yet something as ordinary as sweeping became part of someone else’s memory of those years. We never really know which pieces of our everyday lives are becoming meaningful to the people around us.
I am so, so far from this point but I am still holding that tension with you. Still wanting to write. Still not sure how to do it when my primary identity is mom. Still sweeping. (Always.) It’s interesting how I feel like I should be more. And still, isn’t this enough? I think the psalmist might have something to say about that too.
Oh Jen I remember those early days of empty nesting. Such a weird transition. I remember when Justin (our youngest) left for college. My husband could not even enter his room for a couple of weeks. We missed him so terribly.
We are quite a bit further down the road with both our kids married and having grandbabies, as you know. It is a wild ride--college, marriage, grandbabies!!!! But I wouldn't change a single thing. Each season, while hard at times, has afforded us such blessing. I don't think I'd change one thing. God is so good. Thank you for sharing yourself through the vulnerability your writing. It continues to greatly bless my heart.
"How do I let them be what they were without demanding they continue, sure to decay in my clenched fists?" - this sentence is so how I feel whenever I think of our loud, crazy household emptying out. That desire to HOLD onto the moments and the tiny humans my hubby and I raised...while knowing that love means letting these children go. Beautifully written, Jen. And I love your resolve: "I will write, listening to my life—and to God in my life—and remember that paying attention can be its own act of worship."
Oh, how tightly I want to hold on! And yet how grateful to know that even in this momentous change, it is God who holds onto us!
Beautifully written, Jen. I can’t wait to read whatever emerges from this new season.
Thank you, Marla!
I agree!!
I feel ya...Soren is 23 and moving out in January. Linnea is 18 and taking a gap year.
Crazy that we’re here!
Aww, sending you hugs, Jen! I have completed 1 year of empty nesting and this week I take our second child back to her Sophomore year of college. Our oldest has moved to another state, and this season is so strange!! I feel like my blog has become quite depressing and dark this season as I navigate what life means after the kids have gone. I know they still need us, and young adult struggles hit harder than little babies for whom a Band-Aid or ice cream could cure all ills! Looking forward to seeing what this season lights in your soul as you write and share!
You’re a year ahead of me! Thanks for sharing honestly a glimpse of your journey!
Somedays my hubby tells me to write something a tad more cheerful LOL but I think I am inherently a bit of a dark soul :) I just love tapping into the dark edges of my heart!
This touched my heart so! Every word and the meaning behind it. God is showing me more and more that there is season for everything, yet it is hard to let go. But like you, I will write! Bless you Jen!
Yes life is so seasonal!
“I will write!” i love that so much. PLEASE KEEP WRITING! What a gift your words are.
Thanks, Anjuli!!! ❤️
Thanks for sharing this time of life transition so beautifully. I experienced many of the same feelings nine years ago when my youngest moved out. Let me tell you, there are many joys to come!
What an encouragement! Thank you!
Yes. All the feelings. You are stepping into a new season of writing and it too will be good :). Thinking of you.
Thank you, Lorie!
I love your writing. Now I understand why. "Paying attention can be its own act of worship."
We should all pay more attention, shouldn’t we? Imagine how we might see the God in whom we live and move and have our being!
I totally agree. Attending more closely has been a gift of old age.
**feeling this with you** - yes, you can write. And look: you have already!
So. Many. Feelings. I look forward to another providential meeting on campus!
The sweeping of the kitchen floor caught me. Twenty-five years of motherhood held countless moments worth remembering, and yet something as ordinary as sweeping became part of someone else’s memory of those years. We never really know which pieces of our everyday lives are becoming meaningful to the people around us.
Wow, thank you for sharing. Any advice for someone on the front end of this? (Mom of four… ages 6, 4, 2, baby).
I look forward to following your next season.
I am so, so far from this point but I am still holding that tension with you. Still wanting to write. Still not sure how to do it when my primary identity is mom. Still sweeping. (Always.) It’s interesting how I feel like I should be more. And still, isn’t this enough? I think the psalmist might have something to say about that too.
Oh Jen I remember those early days of empty nesting. Such a weird transition. I remember when Justin (our youngest) left for college. My husband could not even enter his room for a couple of weeks. We missed him so terribly.
We are quite a bit further down the road with both our kids married and having grandbabies, as you know. It is a wild ride--college, marriage, grandbabies!!!! But I wouldn't change a single thing. Each season, while hard at times, has afforded us such blessing. I don't think I'd change one thing. God is so good. Thank you for sharing yourself through the vulnerability your writing. It continues to greatly bless my heart.